FORGET THE ESTROGEN PARTY

Betsy’s birthday is approaching and the one thing that’s on my mind is the birthday lay. EVERYONE I know has gotten laid on his or her birthday EXCEPT BETSY!!!! LMAO. I’m either single and not willing to just sleep with some random person or traveling with my homegirls whom I love, but cumulatively, we’re the estrogen party. There was one time I came close to getting laid on my birthday but my party lasted into the early hours of the next day so even though the brother broke me off, it didn’t count. Sigh.

I thought there was a winner this year. Met an intelligent, witty, attractive brother a while ago who genuinely piqued my interest. After some time, he started acted weird, which led to whack and finally, a violation of his 90-day probationary period according to my good friend Steve Harvey. LOL. Truth be told, brother-man was getting LUCKY with the 90-day rule as Betsy likes to live by the 180-day rule. ☺ Anyway, I Donald Trumped his azz and fired him since he wasn’t on his j-o-b. In his next relationship he should date a cheerleader who will patronize him even when he loses like John Starks in the 1994 NBA Finals or a therapist who will someone to listen to him complain.

Understand that I’m not dismissing diseases, marriages and everything else in between; just saying that I wanted to sweat my perm out! Alas, another dry 25th birthday. LOL. My iPod is loaded with all my you-can-get-it-come-hither songs love songs in addition to two raps – Biggie’s I’m Loving You Tonight and L’il Wayne’s, Mrs. Officer – inclusive of all the accoutrements for accurately role play the latter.

Brothers, please note that this is not a plea for you to help me out. Quite the contrary. I’m certain that Diddy would hook a sister up (LOL) but if I want a one-off thing, I would have done so a long time ago.

Anyway, next year. Same time, different place. For everyone else, check out Kamasutra positions - http://www.jijasali.com/kama.php?category=positions

Shout out to all my folks in the Hamptons this weekend! Holler!

Lata Lovelies,
-Betsy “Baller” Ice