My ex-boyfriend and I from a while ago are finally, at his behest, engaging in a peaceable sort of friendship. The brother is now married.
During the relationship, the ex talked about the many triumphs of his friend, practically willing me to like him though we never met in person. After a while, I became a fan. As luck would have it, I met the ex’s friend a few months after the breakup and realized I had a crush on him. Ironically, the ex’s friend and I move in similar professional circles so we’ve encountered each other several times and he is electrifying and scrumptious. I know all about him but he has no idea who I am outside of work nor does he realize we have a mutual “friend” who happens to be my ex. The only way he would know that (beyond my name) is if my ex whipped out a photograph of me and that would be kind of crazy.
Anyway, I totally dig this brother; he’s soooo my type, if I was a type-caster. The last time I saw him, we were crackling with chemistry but I had to jet, not before I copped some contact information! My ex, again married, mentioned that he and his buddy linked up recently which gave me another clue that they are bonafide friends. Previously, I thought they were acquaintances.
Question is, can I holler at the ex’s friend? I alluded to that tidbit during the conversation with the ex an ol’ boy had the audacity to become irate saying, “You better not.” I laughed it off but thought, “Listen to this sucker. If I want to holler at his boy, there’s nothing you can do to stop me.”
My sentiment is this – we’re all adults and the ex is married. What’s the big deal? Shoo, I’ll even invite him and his wife to the wedding. After all, if had spent less time bigging up the brother, he may not have even crossed my mind.
Lata Lovelies,
-Betsy Baller Ice
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5 comments:
You loose ALL right to feel any type of way about an Ex when you are the one who has moved on: Gotten Married. I bet you the wife would love to introduce you to the friend.LOL What the heck makes a guy or girl think they can still have a say in their EXs dating or sex life when they've jumped the broom with the next love. Give me a freakin break already!!!
Betsy, it's totally o.k. for you to date your ex's friend. HE'S MARRIED!!!! Apparently, your ex must still be 'feelin' some kind of way about you'. Girl, go for it!
chemistry + ex is married = holla at the brotha
My question is when are you going to see him next :-). Forget the ex--he has no say in the matter!
Yeah, whateva!
First, I didn't you were friend with my boy, Betsy! But it's ok, you can holla! I think you're cute too, boo :)
Seriously, the ex doesn't have a say in this matter since he is married. If he is bothered by this hookup, then it means he hasn't fully moved on - his wife should be concerned.
On the other hand, I would ask if you are ready to be the third wheel in this relationship. If they are truly friends, then it is likely that they will not break over you. However, are you willing to withstand the moements when your current and ex boo get together and hang as friends do? Will you be comfortable in a setting where they are both present? If they are friends then its just a matter of time. You are likely to find yourself in the same room with ex-boo who's friend with current boo and then...you. Will you be able to handle it? How confident are you? If you walk in the room and they ae lauging at an inside-joke, will you think they're just having a moment or will you wonder if they're talking about you? Will you wonder "are they comparing notes"?
Are you willing to put yourself in that situation?
Is this mr. right or mr. right now?
Hooking up with him won't be the problem. It's the luggage that comes afterward that will get you.
But, hey...
Whateva!
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